Here is a collection of stories and lessons drawn from my experience with couples.

Marriage communication that leads to connection

In the video above, Rob and Janet’s story shows how communication in itself is not enough. They show us how the key to a happy marriage is communication that leads to connection.

How to break the cycle of blaming and defensiveness

Some marriages get stuck in a brutal cycle of blaming and defensiveness. In this brief video I talk about why this happens and how to break out of this painful place.

How to turn marriage conflicts into healing and growth opportunities

Most of us see conflicts in our marriage as bad. But did you know that conflicts can bring us to new levels of healing and growth we would never experience otherwise? In the video above the story of Mario and Rosa shows us how to turn marriage conflicts into healing and growth opportunities.

How being “too nice” is bad for your marriage and what to do about it.

If you are being nice in order to “keep the peace” in your relationship, that probably means you’re not talking about what you’re really feeling or what’s frustrating you. If that’s the case, you’re not really being nice to your partner, to yourself, or your relationship. Here’s how to be honest in a way that will deepen your connection with each other.

The L.O.V.E. Formula for revitalizing your sex life

Are you living in a sexless marriage? Technically you are if you are having sex once a month or less (USA Today). No one wants that. So here are four steps you can take that will help revitalize your sex life. Click on these links to download the two tools referred to in this video: Caring Behaviors Exercise, Four Powerful Appreciations.

Breaking out of the prison of self-absorption in your marriage

After falling madly in love and making a life-long commitment in marriage, did you wake up one day wondering how your partner can be so self-absorbed? You felt like this was the one who could meet all your needs. But now everything is all about your partner’s needs, wants, and desires! What gives?! This video is about how and why that happens. And it explains how you both can break out of the prison of your own self-absorption and build the marriage of your dreams.

Transforming your marriage from a storm of conflict to a refuge of healing

Debbie and Will were in a storm of conflict and Debbie was blaming it all on Will. He had “anger issues” so in Debbie’s eyes he was 100% to blame for their problems. Against all odds Will turned this situation around and transformed their relationship using three simple skills he learned. This video shows how you can use the same tools and see your marriage transformed from a storm of conflict to a refuge of healing.